cant sleep

i cant seem to sleep again.

sitting comatose, reading or playing games, or even writing some shit blog is more appealing than attempting to go to bed. i tried. i lay there in the dark overwhelmed by my thoughts. dont quite understand why this is all coming down like this now. i keep searching for some sort of trigger, some sense, but it's elusive.

four and a half hours til im supposed to get up and start getting ready for work. yet trying to go to sleep still scares me. holding out a little hope that maybe ill at least get some wild hair up my ass and get this place clean, make some use of this insomnia. but i dont really see that happenning.

fuck.

oh yes, and my headlights have been working perfectly, except for that half hour period it took to drive home, get pulled over twice, and get a 390 dollar ticket. fucking beautiful. how do people not get the idea the universe is out to get them?